Admit it Christians; when you hear a Muslim extremist say he can't wait to sacrifice his own life in order to be rewarded with 72 virgins, you wonder how he could be so foolish as to believe such a pile of bologna.
Then you read your children stories about water being miraculously turned into wine, the seas parting, and an angry/verbally gifted fruit-pushing snake forever altering mankind. As you close the book, you instruct the kiddos to believe without question.
It's the same for every religion.
I have a feeling Mormons, who believe the great Joseph Smith was repeatedly visited by an angel named Moroni, snicker when they think about how gullible Scientologists are to believe the story of how Xenu, dictator of the Galactic Confederacy, 75 million years ago brought billions of people to earth, stacked them around volcanoes and then blew them to bits.
I have a feeling Jehovah's Witnesses, who believe Satan and his demons arrived on earth in 1914 and now rule the world, have a difficult time keeping a straight face when they hear a Hindu speak with great anticipation about coming back to earth as an exotic tree frog.
Many of these stories grew in popularity after people convinced others they were visited by divine spirits, or god himself, who informed them of how the world was created and which earthly behaviors would gain you access to a perfect afterlife.
You believe god created a world full of people, yet only chose to contact a couple. To the fortunate few, god told outlandish stories that, unless born into a family that scared you into believing them, no rational human being would buy.
Or are you under the impression that, had you been born into a family that taught you Xenu's habit of blowing up people with hydrogen bombs was a certainty, you would still be smart enough to reject the story of Scientology and instead believe the tales contained in the book you currently regard as gospel?
When people learn I'm an atheist, they usually want to start an argument about creation, but I have no problem with someone believing the world was started by an intelligent force, as long as their theory ends there.
But thinking the intelligent being then communicated with only a few earthly creatures is where you go off the deep end.
Now, if someone revealed that God approached an ancient person and said, "I command you to strive for perfection while occasionally helping out your fellow man," I might be open to believing him or her; because that actually makes a little bit of sense, and you religious folks rarely portray God as an entity with sense.
Will I Have to Bunk with Hitler?
Since a lot of you Christians think every non-believer will eventually end up in the same place; one day I'll meet some of the vilest creatures in the history of humanity. You, on the other hand, will meet some of the greatest minds in the history of humanity. I bet you're nervous in attempting to come up with the right words to say when you meet Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. for the first time. I would just steer away from anything similar to, "I'm really on board with your, 'judge people by the content of their character,' philosophy"; especially if you drove by the all-black church every Sunday on your way to the all-white church.
Meanwhile I'm nervous about something completely different, and that is trying to figure out how to keep that depraved Adolf Hitler off my ass. You'd think Satan would insist upon strict control of the entire population in hell, but if Satan is really on his game he'll give the worst of the worst free reign over us conscience-filled non-believers.
I know it's the equivalent of throwing non-Christian, non-felons in the same penitentiary as murderers and rapists, not for any horrific act they committed, simply for the beliefs roaming around in their heads, but if that's what the Bible says...
If Hitler has free reign in hell, for all of eternity he'll be able to brutalize the same people he tortured on earth. And wouldn't Satan actually reward horrific behavior on earth?
That's the problem with a one-size fits-all approach to punishment, and why the American justice system is smart enough to vary sentences depending upon the crime committed.
Or does God, who supposedly created the heavens and earth, have no control over what happens to those who don't believe the Bible is a historically accurate book?
But I suppose I'm naive in my belief that, if there is a residence for our souls, those who acted with kindness, without regard for possible reward, will be propped up, while those who treated their fellow man harshly will face some sort of punishment.
I know not all you Christians believe there is a horrific destination where those who don't share your faith will eventually reside, but if all the good people in the world don't go to the same place, does it really matter?
Meanwhile I'm nervous about something completely different, and that is trying to figure out how to keep that depraved Adolf Hitler off my ass. You'd think Satan would insist upon strict control of the entire population in hell, but if Satan is really on his game he'll give the worst of the worst free reign over us conscience-filled non-believers.
I know it's the equivalent of throwing non-Christian, non-felons in the same penitentiary as murderers and rapists, not for any horrific act they committed, simply for the beliefs roaming around in their heads, but if that's what the Bible says...
If Hitler has free reign in hell, for all of eternity he'll be able to brutalize the same people he tortured on earth. And wouldn't Satan actually reward horrific behavior on earth?
That's the problem with a one-size fits-all approach to punishment, and why the American justice system is smart enough to vary sentences depending upon the crime committed.
Or does God, who supposedly created the heavens and earth, have no control over what happens to those who don't believe the Bible is a historically accurate book?
But I suppose I'm naive in my belief that, if there is a residence for our souls, those who acted with kindness, without regard for possible reward, will be propped up, while those who treated their fellow man harshly will face some sort of punishment.
I know not all you Christians believe there is a horrific destination where those who don't share your faith will eventually reside, but if all the good people in the world don't go to the same place, does it really matter?
I Judge, Therefore I Am... Disgusting
One act I could never in a million years understand is the act of judging another human being for behavior that has absolutely no impact on the person or persons doing the judging.
The first obvious is example is homosexuality. Because you churchgoers believe in a book that allegedly says homosexuality is a sin, you look down your nose at those who are naturally attracted to members of the same sex, despite the fact that their homosexuality has no impact on you.
And don't give me that, "If kids see a gay couple, they immediately start asking questions and I shouldn't be forced to explain the birds and the bees before he or she is emotionally ready for such a talk."
Here's how a married man would answer his kids questions about homosexuality if the little tike were to see a gay couple and become curious: "They're a couple like your mommy and I are a couple."
That's easily understandable and sex doesn't enter the picture. After all, if your kids are isolated from homosexual couples and ask why everyone has a mommy and daddy, you'd say something like, "people often meet someone with whom they want to spend the rest of their life and so they get married." You wouldn't say, "A woman marries a man because she enjoys the feel of that particular man's private area entering her private area more than any other man's private area."
So explaining the nature of couple-hood doesn't need to include details about sex. A simple, "Fred enjoys Hank's company above all others, just as I enjoy your mother's company above all others," will suffice.
But rationally explaining the situation to children doesn't allow you to judge others. It doesn't allow you to try and push your beliefs on others. It doesn't allow you to claim homosexuals shouldn't have the right to marry each other or adopt children. It doesn't allow you to be a huge wanker.
And I'm not one of these people who believe everyone should be able to do whatever they wish with absolutely no consequences. If your behavior negatively affects others, you should stop.
But judging others for their own personal choices when those choices don't impact anyone else is simply reprehensible and reveals that your depravity has no end.
What if my sacred book told me that heterosexual sex is a horrible sin!? And don't tell me that procreation is natural and humankind would cease to exist without it, because maybe humankind should cease to exist. Have you seen the way humankind treats each other!? Shucks, organized religion has been trying to wipe out humankind for centuries.
So you can't say that replenishing the earth is natural when your people have killed off scores of individuals who don't agree with your specific beliefs.
Of course you say I'm being ridiculous, because a book declaring homosexual sex to be a sin is perfectly reasonable while a book declaring heterosexual sex to be a sin is asinine. But to those of us who think the Bible is largely fictional, the comparison is not far-fetched.
And why don't you compare your act of judging with homosexuality. They're having relations with people they find attractive. You're judging people for having relations with people they find attractive. Trouble is - you're also having relations with people you find attractive (or are at least desperately begging to do so.)
But, according to you, they should sacrifice their happiness because your sacred book, in which millions of people don't believe, tells you that their behavior a sin.
But I suppose, when all is said and done, you need to constantly judge, because when you're judging others you're not concentrating on self improvement, and you're probably not keen on being reminded of the staggering amount of self-betterment you require.
The first obvious is example is homosexuality. Because you churchgoers believe in a book that allegedly says homosexuality is a sin, you look down your nose at those who are naturally attracted to members of the same sex, despite the fact that their homosexuality has no impact on you.
And don't give me that, "If kids see a gay couple, they immediately start asking questions and I shouldn't be forced to explain the birds and the bees before he or she is emotionally ready for such a talk."
Here's how a married man would answer his kids questions about homosexuality if the little tike were to see a gay couple and become curious: "They're a couple like your mommy and I are a couple."
That's easily understandable and sex doesn't enter the picture. After all, if your kids are isolated from homosexual couples and ask why everyone has a mommy and daddy, you'd say something like, "people often meet someone with whom they want to spend the rest of their life and so they get married." You wouldn't say, "A woman marries a man because she enjoys the feel of that particular man's private area entering her private area more than any other man's private area."
So explaining the nature of couple-hood doesn't need to include details about sex. A simple, "Fred enjoys Hank's company above all others, just as I enjoy your mother's company above all others," will suffice.
But rationally explaining the situation to children doesn't allow you to judge others. It doesn't allow you to try and push your beliefs on others. It doesn't allow you to claim homosexuals shouldn't have the right to marry each other or adopt children. It doesn't allow you to be a huge wanker.
And I'm not one of these people who believe everyone should be able to do whatever they wish with absolutely no consequences. If your behavior negatively affects others, you should stop.
But judging others for their own personal choices when those choices don't impact anyone else is simply reprehensible and reveals that your depravity has no end.
What if my sacred book told me that heterosexual sex is a horrible sin!? And don't tell me that procreation is natural and humankind would cease to exist without it, because maybe humankind should cease to exist. Have you seen the way humankind treats each other!? Shucks, organized religion has been trying to wipe out humankind for centuries.
So you can't say that replenishing the earth is natural when your people have killed off scores of individuals who don't agree with your specific beliefs.
Of course you say I'm being ridiculous, because a book declaring homosexual sex to be a sin is perfectly reasonable while a book declaring heterosexual sex to be a sin is asinine. But to those of us who think the Bible is largely fictional, the comparison is not far-fetched.
And why don't you compare your act of judging with homosexuality. They're having relations with people they find attractive. You're judging people for having relations with people they find attractive. Trouble is - you're also having relations with people you find attractive (or are at least desperately begging to do so.)
But, according to you, they should sacrifice their happiness because your sacred book, in which millions of people don't believe, tells you that their behavior a sin.
But I suppose, when all is said and done, you need to constantly judge, because when you're judging others you're not concentrating on self improvement, and you're probably not keen on being reminded of the staggering amount of self-betterment you require.
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